Nose Carrots, Dirty Diapers and Other Last Laughs

Your kids will always win.

Okay, mine will. I'm conceding defeat. Even if I raise them to be the boys I want them to be, they will still win.

Case in point. I foolishly made fun of Rhee for being able to trick him into eating healthy food today. Usually I can get him to eat whatever we are eating because he has a paranoia of being left out. Because I value some sane time in my day, usually let him watch Disney Junior while eating breakfast and lunch (we do eat dinner as a family at the dining room table so hopefully I haven't ruined him completely). This can either add to my sanity or completely wipe it out, it's a gamble I'm willing to take.  So back to the taunting of my son.

Today was a robust lunch of frozen pizza and sugar snap peas & carrots. I think a nearly two year old could completely subsist on pizza but am not willing to put in the research to support it. Because of this, the peas & carrots. I'm hoping it balances it out somehow. Directly after publicly laughing at him on Facebook for my trickery, I hear a maniacal laugh come from his highchair (which is facing away from me).

As I turn to look, he is stretching his neck to peer around the back of the chair to find me. I immediately notice there is something amiss with his face. One nostril is abnormally large. As I run in for a closer inspection, I realized he has stuffed a carrot up his nose. I am also assaulted by a horrible stench, he has pooped his pants while eating (read: mama is also trying to eat). Guess I'll be losing that baby weight faster than I anticipated.

Well played sir.

You win. You always do.

Zombie Showers

No, I'm not talking about flesh eating walking dead. I'm talking about mommies who just want some sleep and a shower that isn't interrupted by screaming or in my case, my oldest throwing books or picture frames in the shower with me. True story.

I can't be the only mom who gets up early (I hate mornings) so I can get a shower in before Rhee's 2pm nap every day. Some days it works and some days it doesn't. Sitting around dirty in my pjs until the afternoon is not how I pictured domestic life (let's not get into the fairy tale I thought it would be!) but it is my reality.

This is after being up multiple times in a night with a newborn who I think takes secret delight in waking me just to put his paci back in his mouth. I have often thought I heard gleeful laughing after he purposely spits it out for the 256th time in one night.

I digress.

All of this leads to the shower where I am frantically trying to shave my legs (yes, I shave my legs every day, I can't stand it otherwise. I may not do my hair or make up but darn it, my legs will be smooth!) with my eyes half shut from lack of sleep. There is no coherent thought going on at this point, it's just a sleepy race against the clock of two little boys waking up.

Sigh.

But then, God has been good to me this morning. I have showered and have a coffee in hand while blogging without being interrupted.

It's going to be a good day in mommyland.

I Suck at Blogging and Being a Perfect Mother

Not necessarily in that order.

Question is: what do I write about in this over-blogged (yes, I like to make up words) world?

Yes, I'm a perfectionist but this is not the only thing that defines me, it affects my life but it is not who I am. I am things like a daughter, a wife, a mother, a Christian. These things define me more than anything else. Does perfectionism play into any of these? You betcha.

I had my second son, Nicholas on 12/12/12 (best birth date ever!) and Henry (Rhee) is now 22 months. This by far has been the most challenging to me and wanting things just so. My two little boys who don't give a rip about order or how I would like things done.

Schedules out the window, floors always dirty, poop and spit up a regular part of my day, toys everywhere, sleep: not present.

I have talked to a lot of mommies lately to find out what is normal, to gain some kind of perspective. And you know what I've found? We only post the good milestones on Facebook. The wonderful nights of sleep (p.s. I don't believe these really exist, hey, I'm not calling anyone liar here, maybe just some wishful thinking going on), the poops on the potty, my child is reading at 2, etc. Does anyone else feel like they are failing at motherhood when they look at these in jealousy? Most days I'm just trying to survive by giving my boys anything that will keep them from crying at the same time.

I'm not saying you have to be all negative Nancy from now on, I love hearing about all the good things that go on in my friend's lives, especially with their kids. And I love counting both of our blessings. I just want to take some time to blog occasionally to expose my real day to day life with my boys as a SAHM in a positive and hopefully humorous way.

Like during the time it has taken me to write this, I have had to walk away from it approximately 234 times to get something for the boys and Rhee has thrown pizza sauce from the calzones I made for lunch into every possible crevice of his highchair.

Hopefully you can find some encouragement (me too) in knowing that you are not the only one going through the daily struggles (and joys!) of being a SAHM or a working mom juggling professional and home life. I do not claim to be a writer or always grammatically correct and I overuse parenthesis and exclamation points (deal with it!), just a mom trying to survive and even thrive in this environment.

More to come later when I am not trying to type with one hand while also nursing my infant. What are your biggest challenges as a mama?